What do you want?

A question I have been asked very often as of recently. Sometimes its the most difficult question to answer. Like I struggle with answering it. Especially when it comes to expressing my feelings while in a relationship/situationship/dating. The fear of admitting what I want. Because in my mind, if I admit what I want and doesn't meet my expectation, I feel disappointed. So I suppress what I want. It's weird.

But I'm working to change that. Because a) if I do not truly admit what I want, I dont think I will truly be happy; b)knowing what you want helps you to set standards.

♥ A.Erika ♥ 

but God.

Talking about speaking it into existence.*Second paragraph, first couple sentences* I felt a shift coming in my life, not exactly sure when but I knew it was coming. It started with a call from my mom saying that one of her co-workers' husband was looking for a social media coordinator. ^_^. That was sign that I knew something was up. I sent in my application. That same day I scheduled an interview. First interview went well and was called back for a second interview. The Monday before the second interview I was tipped off that I would be laid off from my then current job. Didnt let that distract me from my second interview.

My second interview came with great difficulty. I left my house 1.5 hr before my interview. Traffic was EVERYWHERE! Interstates, backroads, side streets. I broke down because I thought I was late for my interview at 9. I had to call mama lindo so she could soothe and calm me down. Finally get to the interview, thinking I was late. Only to realize my interview was scheduled for 30 minutes later than the original appointment. But God. I even double checked my e-mail, the interview was supposed to be a 9am, instead of 9:30a. But God. Second interview went well and I waited to hear back from them.

The Monday after the second interview, I got laid off from the job I talked about here. I cried because it hurt my feelings. The next day I decided I was going to go to Digital Atlanta so I could learn more about my passion, social media. That same day, my dream came true and I got a call that I would be the new social media coordinator for the company I interviewed for.

When I tell you God is good!! I have been grindin at this thang for about 2 years and never gave up. Even when I was about to. Even when I was about to sign up for the military and the police academy. My spirit could take that decision. First time I experienced the Holy Spirit like that night I was completing my application to police academy. I told God that I was trusting Him with my dream and that I hoped what He wanted is what I wanted. That my plans aligned with His plans. So its said, so its done. I just completed my first week and what an amazing experience it's been. I saw this on twitter and it pretty much sums up how I feel: They say once you love what you do, you'll never work another day in your life. One of the highlights...seeing Esperanza Spalding and Terri Lyne Carrington play live! These are the leading ladies of jazz and I got to see them for free in an amazing venue, that I happen to work for. Talk about blessings that I dont have enough room to store. God is that great!

Just believe and He got you!

♥ A.Erika ♥

Hello October.

Happy October to you all! It is officially autumn. I love saying autumn instead of fall. Fall sounds so...regular. Lol. Anyways, I am really looking forward to this change in seasons. Literally and figuratively. I feel a shift on its way and I am highly anticipating it.

Tuesday night/Wednesday early morning, I couldnt sleep. I was just up, reading my timeline. My TL has been very inspirational lately and it's definitely great because I will take that over excessive ratchetness.  One of my favorite writers/bloggers was reflecting on her journey to entrepreneurship, I was feeling inspired and decided to do the same. So this is straight from my TL...

 After the talk with @DANiBANANii_, journaling, now catching up with my TL, I am feeling inspired and ready for whatever is next. I'm learning its okay to expect GREAT things especially when I've been working hard the past 2 years. Networking, reading, studying, doing whatever is necessary to become the best ME I can. Proud to say that everything has worked together for my good. Even when I couldn't see the light, even when things didnt go according to MY plan, even when I questioned if I was going down the right path. I still knew something great is in store. Just keep grinding and the fruits of your labor will soon blossom. That's what I kept telling myself and now I see sweet fruit slowly blossoming. Now looking back I wouldn't change my journey because it built my character, forced me to take inventory and most of all love myself, flaws and all. Content? Yes. Comfortable? Not quite. But I'm slowly getting THERE and that's what matters. Life is a cross country race. Highs, lows, but persistence and endurance get you through.

I really had to stop and be thankful for where I am and where I'm going. Celebrate small victories while you conquer the war. That is my new motto. So to the last quarter of the 2012. I am so ready and I'm trying to go out of 2012 with a bang. Who is with me?

♥ A.Erika ♥

deadlines

As a designer, adhering to deadlines comes with the territory so one would think, my personal life would follow suit. But that's definitely not the case. Whenever I set deadlines for something, it seems I hardly get it done. Then I get upset and disappointed. But I fail to realize how busy I really am. With work, church, AIGA, family, friends, freelance work, etc, time seems to slip away. My day starts between 7a-7:30a and I often don't get home until 9:30 (ish)pm. Then I HAVE to entertain my family. If I dont, it's a "subtle" issue. Sometimes I really don't feel like talking to anyone when I get home, but I take my moment in the car to get my energy together and walk in. Yes, gather energy, because if you follow me on twitter, you already know how LIVE my house is on a regular basis. Then foolin with my family means midnight comes around quicker than I can blink my eye. I say that all, not as an excuse, but realizing that while I have these ambitious goals for my blog, I have to be realistic. So my blog launch date is TBA. Launching sooner than later.

But GUESS WHAT?! www.ashleelindo.com is LIVE! Y'all check out. It just hosts my portfolio for now but as I'm learning HTML and CSS, I hope to create my site that reflects my brand and my portfolio will be one of the menu options on my site. Next step: get Google Analytics because my site comes up on the SECOND page of google search when I search my name. Other than that, I have a few projects that I can't wait to share so I'm working and staying busy!

Much love,

♥ A.Erika ♥

expectations

I think one of my biggest problems is that I expect too much from people. I expect and forget people are human. Humans disappoint. We cant help it. There is something you will or will not do that fall short of that expectation. 

Or maybe the problem is my feelings get really hurt when people do not meet my expectations. 

Or maybe the problem is my expectations are too high for people who CANT meet my them. 

Either way it goes, I am learning to deal with my reactions to the unmet expectations. Not become as affected. It's difficult because I dont want to become numb to people. So I'm realizing there is a fine line to not caring and not being affected. I want to learn that latter because that comes with accepting the situation for what it is and not let it consume my thoughts. Responding rather than reacting. Difficult task but I know I can do it. Just time and prayer.

♥ A.Erika ♥

6 month hiatus.

Photo shoot sneak peek! Courtesy Sakeenah Saleem.

Oh hi there! If there is anybody out there and still following. Oh how I treat this blog like a red headed step child. But I'm here alive and kicking. I've been missing this outlet. Soooooo many things have happened since the last entry. It would take multiple entries to catch up on everything. The funny thing is I have fully written posts in the drafts ready to be posted but I never posted them. SMH.

But I will hit the big updates in short form. I am in the job market looking for a new opportunity, in marketing and/or social media and/or graphic design. Link to portfolio and resume, can be found HERE. I would like to transition into a new role by October. I bought an iPhone. I just recently bought a new laptop so I'm thinking posts wont be as sporadic. Being without a laptop for over a year has been so rough. #majorfirstworldproblem. Speaking of blogging, I am launching my new blog by August 31, more details on that closer to the launch date. I have a new beau! Roster went from 1 to 2 to 3 and back to one in a matter of months. I took a break this summer from all most of the church responsibilities. I had my photoshoot and the pics came out GREAT! I created my vision board and finally wrote my mission statement. I have a new mentor! I love her and all the knowledge she is giving me. My life has been very full and this year is flying by. More posts to come about in further details about everything. But I'm learning to live in the moment and enjoy and take it one day at a time!

♥ A.Erika ♥

Perfection is a cancer.

As a child, I was under the impression if I do everything perfect, I would be successful or reap the best. Oh how I was wrong. I even stopped myself from doing things because I knew I wouldn't be perfect for it. SMH. I've realized perfection only leads to crazy thoughts, behaviors, and procrastination. Nobody can ever be perfect. We were created with flaws or in sin, however you want to say it. So don't allow perfection to stop you from doing what you want. I know I'm guilty of that. I'll say things like oh I have to wait until I get things in order or get myself together. Eff that. You have to just start sometimes and everything will come together. I was having a gchat convo with one of my friends regarding perfection. And she said, you know how many mediocre people are successful? Tons. And I had an aha-moment. I'm wasting time waiting on "perfect conditions" and other people starting with no plan are creating genius ideas. So I'm hanging up my perfectionist cape and start creating. I hope you all will too.

♥ A.Erika ♥